Marriage and Customs
Question:
Aslamo Alaikom, Sir I want to know that in our culture (Pakistan) we are acostumated with our own culture i think. We have our own version of Islam unfortunately. So my question is about nikkah. Its obligatory to do this proces of which we do normally in Pakistan, like 6 kalams, surrahs,...etc etc...What is the simple way in Islam. I've heared from Ghamidi sahab that a couple who wants each other (love) they can simply arrange stage and gather people and tell the people that from today they are a couple (wife and husband) and thats it. Is this correct. and what about the whole process we proceed now a days in Pakistan. Is this sunnah?
Answer:
Wa Alaykum Assalam,
Every culture has their own version of Islam. The way out of this is to concentrate on what the Qur’an and the established Sunnah of the Prophet (pbuh) says rather than what people say or what the custom is.
As for Nikah, the ingredients that according to the Shari’ah are needed are as follows:
- The agreement of the couple to enter a marriage contract that makes them husband and wife for the rest of their lives.
- Public announcement of the marriage
- The groom providing a dowry to the bride
The Prophet (pbuh) as the head of the state also ordered that marriage should take place after getting the agreement of the guardians (Wali) or the court. There are many Muslim countries that hold the same condition as a regulation and this seems to be a very helpful way to make sure about the future of the couple and their healthy relationship with the rest of the family.
Apart from the above any other custom and procedure, including those that you mentioned have nothing to do with Islam.
Please note, this does not necessarily mean that these customs are wrong and should not take place. There is absolutely nothing wrong with following customs according to the culture, while fulfilling the main ingredients of a marriage contract as listed above. Some of these customs are in fact deeply meaningful and can leave very nice and heart-warming memories in the minds of the couple. I however appreciate that there are also some customs that are problematic and do not really serve any good purpose. If any of these customs go against one of the above mentioned ingredients of marriage then obviously they should be avoided. Also if any custom creates so many trouble and complications and involve too much cost and effort then these too are better to be avoided. Entering a marriage contract as prescribed by the Shari’ah is a very simple and easy procedure. It is best to keep it that way.
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February 2013
Aslamo Alaikom, Sir I want to know that in our culture (Pakistan) we are acostumated with our own culture i think. We have our own version of Islam unfortunately. So my question is about nikkah. Its obligatory to do this proces of which we do normally in Pakistan, like 6 kalams, surrahs,...etc etc...What is the simple way in Islam. I've heared from Ghamidi sahab that a couple who wants each other (love) they can simply arrange stage and gather people and tell the people that from today they are a couple (wife and husband) and thats it. Is this correct. and what about the whole process we proceed now a days in Pakistan. Is this sunnah?
Answer:
Wa Alaykum Assalam,
Every culture has their own version of Islam. The way out of this is to concentrate on what the Qur’an and the established Sunnah of the Prophet (pbuh) says rather than what people say or what the custom is.
As for Nikah, the ingredients that according to the Shari’ah are needed are as follows:
- The agreement of the couple to enter a marriage contract that makes them husband and wife for the rest of their lives.
- Public announcement of the marriage
- The groom providing a dowry to the bride
The Prophet (pbuh) as the head of the state also ordered that marriage should take place after getting the agreement of the guardians (Wali) or the court. There are many Muslim countries that hold the same condition as a regulation and this seems to be a very helpful way to make sure about the future of the couple and their healthy relationship with the rest of the family.
Apart from the above any other custom and procedure, including those that you mentioned have nothing to do with Islam.
Please note, this does not necessarily mean that these customs are wrong and should not take place. There is absolutely nothing wrong with following customs according to the culture, while fulfilling the main ingredients of a marriage contract as listed above. Some of these customs are in fact deeply meaningful and can leave very nice and heart-warming memories in the minds of the couple. I however appreciate that there are also some customs that are problematic and do not really serve any good purpose. If any of these customs go against one of the above mentioned ingredients of marriage then obviously they should be avoided. Also if any custom creates so many trouble and complications and involve too much cost and effort then these too are better to be avoided. Entering a marriage contract as prescribed by the Shari’ah is a very simple and easy procedure. It is best to keep it that way.
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February 2013